So I thought it was time to post about why I chose to do the 12wbt. I figure everyone has their own reasons, and so these are mine. I've just read someone else's blog tonight which reflected on the fact that everyone seems to be losing their enthusiasm and confidence that we all had in week 1, and I completely agree, the forums are full of this sentiment today. And, I think that I'm also feeling a little like that, so time to remind myself - why am I doing this??
I've always been overweight. Actually I honestly don't remember a time when I wasn't. I was never good at sport in school. I don't remember fitting into girls size clothing, but felt like I went straight into women's size 14-16 as a young teenager. And so I've always battled with my weight. There are many reasons, and I don't lay blame with anyone, but it is what it is. I didn't really learn healthy eating habits in my youth. It wasn't that my family always ate takeaway, in fact that was really rare, my mum was (is) a fantactic cook - but I don't think I ever learnt about portion control, and I never learnt to put a couple of lollies/choc/chips etc in a small bowl to eat, rather than taking the packet to the table.
When I was at uni I joined a gym for the first time ever, it was terrifying at first, but I soon grew to love it, and also managed to lose about 20kg. But, it crept back on. A few years later I joined a gym after moving away from home for work, I got a PT, and I lost about 25kg. But... it all went back on and then some! So a few more years went by, I was still a member of my gym, they were having a 'biggest winner' comp (ie losing weight) so I entered - I lost almost 30kg! I was one of the top prize winners! And still I let the weight go back on. I am a classic yo-yo dieter.
But through all that I have learnt what works - exercise and healthy eating - but it's about doing both! So I've tried to do that. Counting calories, writing down everything I eat, getting to the gym. But I struggle with consistency! And so it hasn't worked. Finally I got to the point where I was back weighing over 100kg, and thought 'I've had enough!'.
A number of friends did round 1 of 12wbt this year. So I asked them about it, and specifically about the food. You see, I don't have a lot of spare time in my days (who does!?) and I didn't want to be spending every moment at home cooking so that I could keep it up. But all reports were so positive about the taste and easy preparation of the food. So I thought I'd give 12wbt another go. I had tried it before in 2011, but back then I was trying to do a little bit of Michelle's way + a little bit of my way. The result? I gave up by about week 4.
So, it's come to this. Round 2 2013 12wbt and I'm in and committed! I decided to give the program a go and do it as a holistic program without trying to alter little bits on the side. So I've been following the workouts, and following the food almost exactly - I've just customised a few meals that were egg based (intolerance). Other than that I've tried new foods and things I 'don't' like (but in reality I do). I'm in this to lose weight and change my mindset for life!!! I do not want to be that yo-yo dieter anymore.
It's been a bit of a funny day for me, I was initially disappointed with myself for my 600g loss this morning - but I turned that around and decided that 600g is fantastic!! I'm in no competition with anyone (even myself), and I gave it my all last week. If my body can only reflect that with 600g then that's OK. I feel like I've lost weight, my clothes feel better, and I'm definitely getting fitter!! This afternoon I came home from work exhausted - didn't get to the gym for cardio, and then tried to hunt through the cupboard for treat food...
Did I find any?
Well, the closest thing was hot chocolate drink, and a homemade fruit crumble dessert in the freezer.
Did I eat them?
Yes I did!
Am I regretting that choice?
Yes, to the extent that the rest of the hot choc mix is now in the bin and I've gone through cupboard/fridge/freezer to search out any other temptations in there and I've binned them!
Is there a high point in this story?
Yes! For one thing I didn't get in the car and drive to the shops for a block (or 2) of chocolate. And, I realised that there was still temptations in my house and got rid of them! That's a positive to come out of a negative for me.
And so after a bit of a lull in the 12wbt thus far, I am still committed. I still want to get up tomorrow and smash out a workout (well, the cardio I missed today and then weights!). I want to change my life still, and it's still going to take effort. I just need to be consistent.
Well, that's why I chose 12wbt. What about you?